Books, an escape, a travel, a time warp. Read, so you could visit different wonderlands.

(Source: thepaulineanatomy)

Things will get better, only if you let them.

I’m going to make kwento about our epic day and you better read it okay? Haha.

Yesterday was an unprecedented Friday. In the morning around 5, I feel exhausted even before I could open my eyelids, heavy as fudge chocolate being poured on a sundae, only this was the bad kind. I struggled out of bed and chugged down white coffee. I prayed, “Lord, I surrender this day to you. Whatever happens, happens.” When I arrived in school, mental checklist, let’s see, I have to survive the recitation, and holy cheesus we have an exam (?!?!?!) but no fuss, it’s okay, then a long quiz afterwards? I have to surive 4 periods, then shoot for a vid project then party!

——

We planned a surprise party for our friend, she cried cos no one, NO ONE IS GREETING HER. I was apathetic to her puffy eyes. Until the end of the day, we kept our mouths shut. I count the hours until I am free from the chains of academic work. Until we called for the last scene, 5:08pm, I could feel the anticipation as my friends called and asked me where I was, I ran through the buildings towards the car park where the gang waited, with their cars; music turned up, and filled with undercover party paraphernalia. My mum was texting me, she said “I’m gonna leave, be home by 6pm okay? Love u” I was like, shoot. Sorry mom, here I go again with my ambush pagpapaalam! My dad is out of town, my sisters at home, and mom’s gon go out with friends for a TGIF, but I want my own TGIF too :( I felt bad tho cos I’ve been going home late for hmm, let’s see, every freaking day for the past week? Ha! I chuckled to myself, you are a bad bad kid. Whilst the exchanging of msgs to my mum and dad, we were already driving to Von’s place! (Remember Cup Ramen tuesdays? My posts last 2011-12? The place where we’re free? Hee!)

— Fast forward to the surprise, we threw chocolate cake, blasted music, and hosed my friend. Lol we are such lovely friends right. Then our house party started. We had water guns with us, some of our friends didn’t want to get wet, what kill joys, anyway of course I wouldn’t allow it. We rode the motorcycle (what a lovely vintage ride) and chased them around the village, haha it was like GTA. My mum texted around 8PM and said that I should go home, and I said we’re almost done, it was 9PM already and she went out to have her TGIF with friends, and said that I should get home first before she does or else I’m doomed. It was already 10PM still Ika and I were biking around with wet clothes screaming “WE’RE FREEEE!!!” Others were jamming with their electric guitars. I hosted the 18 roses, informally, and proceeded with having fun. It was already 11PM and my mum was furious, haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. I AM SO DEAD. We rode Vince’s car and felt high of life, Ika and I got off the car to run the highway and buy Ice cream and food as bribe to my mum. HAHAHA I got home and it was almost 12AM. Oh well, teenagers, teenagers. Being scolded was worth it. Sorry Mum, I can’t promise to be not reckless. But I’ll go home in one piece, every time. Haha I miss nights like this!

The Pauline Anatomy Online Shop; set III

Finally, my love and passion for flower crowns, that Alice, Thumbelina, Fairy feel. Making a floral wreath or crown feels like weaving magic into it. Sorry, I still have this “I do believe in fairies” Neverland kid in me. These are limited pieces/made to order, cos I’m the only one who’s whole heartedly crafting this. So I need more time if you want one since I’ve been receiving quite a lot of requests already, and I really am grateful for it. <3

First up, the OLIVIA FLOWER CROWNIt has golden buds and Deep Pink (Scarlet?) Daisies (almost red) made from thin craft wood, better quality compared to the usual cloth it looks realistic and prettier. 

My signature colours; Sky blue roses x pink flowers x blue baby’s breath flower crown. PAULINE FLOWER CROWN.

Lol, candid shot. Thanks again to my cousin!

Next is, AMETHYST FLOWER CROWN, I wanted to name this Veronika cos of the book that I’m reading but I figured Amethyst is more appropriate. :> It’s my favorite amongst the gems!

Wearing my flower crowns will give you fairy powers. Haha I feel like I am thumbelina…. or not. Or just a girl lost in the secret garden or something. :>

Next, is the GOLDEN GIRL FLOWER CROWN, I love sun flowers so much. Enough said. 

I love every photo so much I wish I can all make them my DP or cover photo, haha!

Candid, while sniffing my nose, oh this one is a beauty. I mean the crown, haha! ATHENA FLOWER CROWN. AAAHHHH, I feel like an enchantress. 

I’ve always had a thing for forest creatures, to the mythical ones to the real ones. Pixies to deers and elves. While making these flower crowns, Garden 2 was playing (I’m gonna upload that song here) on my speakers and my room just felt aaahhhh I feel like I’m in an enchanted forest. That’s the word, enchanted. These were captured by my cousin Andrea! <333

These babies take time to make, wow that sounded wrong. Hahaha! Place your orders VIA FACEBOOK, i repeat. I will not entertain questions here anymore regarding the price and majiggas, hassle e haha. I’m only one person making all of these, tho I have some help from P, it’s quite hard to manage especially that I’m just starting. I’m also testing if this will work out if not I’d have to stop making DIYs for you guys, and we do not want that to happen right? Yes, I’m selling them for a reasonable price, but I’m also evaluating the pros and cons, by making, I really need time, I’ve been sacrificing sleep for almost 4 days now. I’ve got little booboo’s on my hands and my back hurts. Haha *groan* Anyway, if you love someone, er, something, no matter how hard it is you’d do anything right? Well, as long as it’s worth it. I do hope it is, seeing from your feed back. I’m grateful. :) Take note that my office hours is from 6-8PM. I am online during those times regarding taking in orders from my shop. That is the only time I will entertain orders starting now. Also, It’s my day off during the weekends, I’m either out on the beach or reading a book. Well, it also depends when I’m online. Cos I am not 24/7 online you know. Thank you! You guys are the best! :) I’m really tired right now cos I slept around 3am and woke up around 7am. Anyway, I am enjoying crafting! It’s a different summer :) Cheers! 

IMPORTANT NOTICE:

FOR ALL THE ORDERS THAT REQUIRES SHIPPING, I WILL SHIP NEXT WEEK. WHEN I HAVE FINISHED THE DIY’S. THE MODE OF PAYMENT WILL BE THROUGH SMART MONEY. KINDLY GOOGLE AND OR ASK ME ON FACEBOOK. HEHEZ. THANKS. :)

The choice is up to you, on how you will react, respond, and receive the world around you. You can either rant about how your life is so boring and that you don’t get what you want, or you can make a choice and do something about it. Remember, only boring people get bored. It is a choice, on how you will write the pages of your life, yes there is a God up above, he gave us free will, and I know that he takes joy in watching us when we live our life, using our different skills and doing what we love. It’s only a matter of how you see things, maybe I look at things differently, well, we all do. But in my reality, maybe it’s a tad bit hard to explain, but I take things like I am a character in a book, my senses are heightened. Like, when I was in a book shop, a random stranger said ‘Hi’, then he left. I wonder if we’ll cross paths again in our universe or what or why did we cross paths that day. I chose to not make plans-plans, in a sense that I get furious when things don’t go the way as planned. I learned that they happen that way because something better is bound to happen. I let things be, like meeting up with a friend I haven’t seen for ages, talking in a coffee shop about how he wants to be a president to lucid dreaming to controlling our sub conscious, one time, I thought of when was the last time life surprised me, y’know those unexpected moments? I asked myself, maybe I’m being a control freak again? So I decided to just, let go. Let things fall into place, but I can choose the things that I want. Random things like friends ambushing you at home and receiving a book that you’ve been wanting to have, to actually doing the things you love to do like crafting and being able to reach quite a large audience, to affecting people’s lives. Sometimes, I feel like I’m just dreaming. That when I look in the mirror, what if I’m not myself or am I myself? what is myself anyway? Some say that, ‘anglikot talaga ng utak mo’ and it’s nice to hear, in a way. When it comes to me making art. I’ve read a quote that says, “To be able to think creatively is smart, but to make the visual concrete is genius” or something like that. The thing is, let your mind wander, be inspired, keep the people that serve you good and make you happy, make mistakes, learn from it, read books, travel, sleep, eat anything you want, laugh, cry, sing even if you don’t know the lyrics, dance in your undies, let go of the things that doesn’t help you in any way, people will always have something to say, but you live your life you hear me? Like in the quote that I’ve read, “Life is like photography, you use the negatives to develop”. Amen? AMEN! You choose if you’re gonna be sad, if you’re gonna be insecure, you choose if you’re gonna hate, and live an awful life. You choose what you give importance to, you love who you want to love, forgive even though they do not ask for forgiveness, forgive yourself, ask for forgiveness, repent, sometimes doing the right thing is hard but it’s for the best, you eat what you want to eat, you choose what you want to be. And I chose to be myself, accepting my flaws, little quirks, to do what I wanna do, to love, to free myself from others’ opinions, to jump around, to just be and everything in between. 

{ Sam, 021713 }

Props to my little sister who gave me a complete set of watercolour tubes as a gift on my 18th. Love you little monster.

note: I am trying to reply as much I can, 1,514 messages in total and growing still. I read your heartfelt messages. Sometimes, I really don’t know what to say anymore. Like, I wish I could hug you in real life saying how much I am grateful to be blessed with readers like you. You inspire me guys, thank you for being there. I love you okay?

As I grow older, everything seems to be within reach. Tho it may be hard sometimes, cos life is never easy. But there’s this certain wisdom, a certain peace within me that concurs. Only the important things are what matters to me, all the negative, yes, they’re there only to serve as a reminder of what is important. People will criticize, ridicule, but that’s all that they can ever do, judge. But they would never, ever, have the capacity to live the life that I live. It is liberating, empowering, and emancipating. I know I’ll make more mistakes, more lost days, more scolding, more criticizing, heck, all of it will never stop! But one thing is constantly changing, me being stronger, wiser, and a better person. All of the mishaps and good times make me who I am. I want to experience and stumble and succeed and fly and more. Who knows what my 18th year has in store for me? Maybe love? or travelling? or performing? Hah. Who knows.17 year old self, you deserve a pat on the back. You’ve been hella great. Cheers to more mistakes, mischief, and madness. To the people who have always been there, you know I love you. To the people I will meet, hello! To the ones I’ve lost, we’ve had our time and share of memories, to those who are planning to stay you are more than welcome, to those who wants to leave, I have an automated seat eject machine thank you, and to God, Hey Gman, you have a purpose for me, a life well lived, an awesome adventure that is beyond a minuscule human brain can fathom. I will keep my faith and be still. Thank You for 18 wonderful years of existence. 

I got back from wonderland I guess? A forest nymph or a lost pixie, either way. I’ll figure it out. I always get lost, but that is where I find the greatest adventures. Here is a montage of photos. Gloomy weather, but we traipsed in little puddles of rainbows. Hello, I am 18 and alive. 

Memoirs of La Lune

How can I be fully aware as the present is now ticking its way to the past? The grains of time slowly sifting towards the other end. I know what is now is now. That soon now is just a foreign place that we once traced our foot steps on. That these pavements will forever keep the secrets we didn’t dare to tell the world. Secrets that we both knew but we never really told each other. These walls, are the only witness to our hushed conversations about the moon and how the airplane crossed it and never looked back. Strangers, faceless people, and some aren’t people, how the crowd seemed to blur and we just ran. My golden hair as you described, back-lit from the sun, maybe I am a golden girl. I miss my golden hair, I miss the sun and other celestial bodies that collide. How you told me things that you’ve never told anyone else, how you felt free and happy. I wish I could grasp that memory by my bare hands. That is why I take photos, we remain the same in those four corners of infinity. The cornucopia of lights twinkling, resonating, calling. It’s bittersweet to say the word ‘remember’, that now is already forlorn beneath the pages of the past. I took risks. And that included the risk of losing. But I do not dare tamper with the memoirs of la lune, we left it open ended, clean with rough edges but perfect. 

So it’s back to school already! I am still hung over on vacation. I’ll surely miss dozing off til noon and sleeping at the wee hours of the morning. I need to adjust again, from 3am to 11pm or earlier. As my new year’s resolution, I vow to blog and share stories more frequently. I don’t like to forget what it’s like to freely write, so I’m going back. Today, we scouted for venues! Hah. Ultimate part planners! In 12 days time, everything has to be ready. :) Uh-oh, more than my debut there’s also one thing I am kinda kinakabahan of, do you have any idea what it is? AGGGGHHH. :> Okay I will shut up for now. I have iPod photos of the place, but I’d rather share HD photos. Teehee, I’ll update you on the plans! Sigh, so here I go, writing shamelessly, yet cautious. Tangled words finding its way to be understood. I miss someone right now. I am hungry. I want milk. Biology please don’t bore the soul out of me. Hi I am thankful for you all. Phrases, sentences, all scrambled in my head. I need to stop overthinking, but I need to think. I need to let go, and let God.

As you can see here, I decided to customize my fillers cos they are plain. I don’t like the shiny ones tho so I bedazzled it unto my own liking. Writing is my bestfriend. And I like sticking notes to people. I really should sleep now. My eyes are crying to be sewn shut. Talk to you real soon guys!

xx pauline

(Source: thepaulineanatomy)

I fell asleep texting, but woke up from time to time cos I knew you weren’t at home. It was around 3am and you were still with your friends, you weren’t replying as much so I didn’t too. Around 5:30am I woke up yet again, saw a text message that says, “When you wake up, go down to your front yard, I left something :) (4:30am)” The annoyance I felt the night before seemed to vanish and I felt the feeling of umaga pa lang buo na agad araw mo feeling. I texted you asap and asked if you are serious cos like what in the world would you do, or drop by in front of my house at midnight? Then you said, just go down. Hah. Anticipation occurred, I grabbed the keys, opened the door, everyone still asleep, and a smile etched upon my morning face from ear to ear. My mum went down and asked why, I smirked and said, ‘Someone left a rose at midnight’. Then you shared the story of how you ninja mode to our house, and the fear that people might mistake you as a robber or something and how you and your friends drove around at midnight just to find that rose, hah. Thank you for your random little surprises, I love the little things. 

Note: I almost forgot, the note in it that says, Hi Pauline! Good morning, I love you. :) <3 P___